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Confucious say…

Elevator smell different to midget.

Copyright & Trademarks

All of the items we sell on this site are our intellectual property. Those are two big words that mean we’ll sue you if we have to to protect our products and our investment. We love having a good time and laughing about the world in general. So don’t be a bag of dicks and steal what we’ve come up with.

All of our ideas are ours. All of them. Don’t steal. Or you won’t get to play in our sandbox anymore.

Trademarks – We have three of them.

Our name – Bound By Nothing  & Bound By Nothing, LLC

Our Logo – With any colors.

And our tagline – Bound By Nothing…but your dirty imagination!

All trademarked with the US Patent and Trademark office found at

So again – Don’t rip us off!



The awesome bow on the first slider of the home page was Designed by

This place is seriously amazeballs and everybody should go check out their awesomeness!

Terms & Conditions

Below is all the stuff we shouldn’t have to say but so many people in the world are entitled or stupid or both so we’re going to take the time to say all of this so naysayers of the future can’t come back and give us shit about commonsense stuff everybody should already know.

  1. Be damn sure you know what you’re buying before you process the order. Going back and forth about “well I thought” and “couldn’t you just” and “now I’m not sure about”…. Yeah, sucks to be you. If you bought it, that means you BOUGHT IT. Very simple.
  2. When you buy something from us you agree not to photocopy our work. At all. Yes I’m talking to you. It’s really not that expensive and we actually like to eat just like you do. So if you want to get one for you and a friend too, that’s great! Buy a second one for twice the price!!
  3. There are no returns on these items. Because seriously why in the world would you want to return it if you already read #1 above and you’re not planning on doing #2 above. #2….Heeeheheheheee
  4. When we mail your orders we will absolutely be putting tracking info on. We will email you tracking numbers as soon as they’re out the door. Go us! So if you don’t receive the email – instead of sending us a nasty email – check your junk folder and see if for some reason it got sent over there. We’ll both be happy you did. You’ll feel good because you were nice and we’ll feel good because we didn’t feel the need to social media shame you across the interwebs.
  5. These covers are meant to be funny. Only funny. Don’t be a bully with them. Don’t be an asshole. Don’t give one to a suicidal person. Don’t use them to spread hate. Cause seriously – karma is a bitch and she will chase your ass down when you least expect it. And our attorney will give her your address.
  6. By buying our products you agree not to copy them, not to rip our ideas off and in general be awesomesauce!
  7. If you get a papercut put some H2O2 on it, instead of sending us an angry email.
  8. If you send us an angry / ranting / douche canoe email you are agreeing for us to post it in any fashion we see fit. We might change the names of your aforementioned douche canoe message but that’s up to us. So if you’re not up to owning your assholian tendencies life and in color for the rest of our followers to enjoy and mock then….in the infamous words of Thumper…If you can’t say nothin’ nice, then don’t say anything at all.
  9. If you want to share your awesomeness with our covers then please please please click on the social media links at the top or bottom of any page. We love seeing our deliciously dirty stuff all over!!
  10. Prices are subject to change without notice and orders calling for future shipment will be billed according to the price in effect at the time of shipment, unless otherwise specified.
  11. Prices on the specified products are exclusive of all city, state and federal excise taxes, including without limitation, taxes on manufacture, sales, receipts, gross income, occupation, use and similar taxes. Wherever applicable (Orders for the state of TX), any tax or taxes will be added to the invoice as a separate charge to be paid by the Buyer.
  12. Unless otherwise stated on the face of the invoice, all packaging will be in accordance with Bound By Nothing’s standard practices for all shipments.
  13. There is no cancellation of orders because they are filled so fast.
  14. All orders must be paid in advance and immediately. No you cannot send a check / cashier’s check nor a Money Order. No we will not send them COD. No we will not hold your order if your CC declines. Have your shit together. Very simple.
  15. We take all 4 major credit cards and can take checks via the interface too. Don’t use fake or stolen cards. If you need a refresher on Karma please see #5 above one more time.
  16. Warranty – are you shitting me? It’s a piece of paper. Glossy and gorgeous and fantastic! But it’s still paper. If you rip it – No we will not be sending you another one. If your kid spills water on it – still a no on a replacement. If it’s damaged in shipping – oh that’s right we’ve NEVER had one damaged in shipping because of the crazy thick ass tubes we use so don’t try that either.
  17. In NO EVENT will Bound By Nothing be liable for any mental, physical, emotional or spiritual harm our products cause. Again they’re FUNNY so go forth and spread the joy!
  18. Privacy Policy – We hate it when random shitty ass companies get a hold of our info so they can try to sell us penis enlargers, travel vouchers or Russian brides so we don’t share or sell or taunt anyone with your information. That includes your contact info, order history, IP address, book cover preferences, etc. So you can order the dirtiest stuff we have to offer and your secrets are safe with us. PS – This statement does not apply to the hatemongers out there that decide they need to vomit douchebaggery via email or voicemail. Any of that awfulness we’re telling you right now we have every intention of spreading it far and wide via every social media outlet currently available and a few we’re planning on inventing just to publicly shame you. Toodles!
  19. If you really made it to the bottom of this list you’re a fucking rockstar!!